The moment and the house

Let´s see if this works. The picture above is Palace Stoclet, (click on the pic to see the full of it, I am no nerd when it comes to this stuff, sorry) a house by the architect Joseph Hoffman. No I haven´t been there, haven´t been to Brussels, but I think I wouldn´t mind living in that house. Even though it´s right by a busy road, but I´d put up with that if I had the chance to live in a fantastic house like that, so strange,a genius work of art, a building so un-tectonic.

I went for a late night walk.

Now I am listening to familiar music from my past again, and trying to hold onto the thoughts and emotional landscapes that I got into yesterday, and more tonight, as I was discovering new areas again. I found something really nice, something completely new, a place that reminds me of Stockholm. I like Stockholm a lot.

I miss living in a smaller town. I never would have thought that I would feel that way, but I must admit, I really do now. I miss walking around late at night and being the only person out and about. I miss the sight of desolated places, quiet early morning jogs and the ability to actually have a wholesome relationship with where I live. Here I can only have a grip on a certain smaller area, not the whole city. 

I miss libraries where I can relax, sit in my own little corner without being harrased.  ( yes that has actually happened to me here and the memory still makes my skin crawl). I miss peace and quiet and even though I have lived in the center of each town and city that I have lived in, I think I would be just fine somewhere in the middle of nowhere. I want my own house, a house with him, and I want it to be old and creaky.

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Oh well.

I bought pine oil today and am determined to make pine the smell of this season in my life.

Next I need to find new music to suit the mood.

The new painting is coming along nicely, I already have a name for it.

I saw an ad in some art magazine that said 

 "YOU HAVE MORE FREEDOM THAN YOU ARE USING"  

it really hit me. It´s true.

One night at work I thought to myself that the best thing about being an adult is being able to buy and bake cookies whenever I feel like it. The rest is pretty much just annoying responsibilities and stupid maneuvers that feed capitalism.

But I do also have some freedom. To me that freedom is walks at night, looking around me when everyone else seems to be asleep, the possibility of reading poems and drinking green tea whenever I need to. 

Or at least those are my favorite things that I can do, because I have freedom. I should do them more often. I will try.